The Anti Mary Sue Agency
by silmirof4077
Summary: Welcome to the AMSA, a comapany that hunts down and rehabilitates Mary Sues.
1. Welcome to the AMSA

_Well this is my fic. Just a short chapter to see if you like it, if so review. This chapter is just to introduce a few thing about the AMASA . We'll learn more about Tam later._

Twenty or so young people shuffled nervously, pulling on the collars of their new polo shirts and taking quietly to each other. Tam breathed deeply almost most shaking with anticipation.

Ever since she had been a teenager she had dreamt of the chance to become one of the elite working at the AMSA. And now her dream had come true.

All the new recruits were jammed into the small room, waiting to be introduced to the AMSA. The only person who looked totally at ease was a brown haired woman sitting with her feet on a desk. She looked no older then 25 and she was smiling happily surveying the many nervous people in front of her. She threw a meaningful look to the back of the room.

The room went black and a video began to play. A monotone voice issued from the speakers and the new recruits began furiously taking note in the semi darkness. A mechanical voice issued from the ceiling.

"Welcome to the Anti-Mary-Sue Agency or the AMSA for short. We exist to find, capture, assimilate and release Mary-sues.

This sector of the AMSA is **The Lord of the Rings **sector and one of the most seriously affected by Mary-Sues. We… we...we...we...we..."

The voice stuttered and then stopped abruptly and the lights flicked back on. The woman sitting at the back of the room cursed softly then stood up and surveyed her new students with interest. " Welcome," she said her voice half breathless half stern. "To the AMSA. My name is Sandra and I am in charge of you. You are here because you are the best geeks, Tolkien lovers and Mary Sue haters in the country." Sandra's voice shook with pride. " While you are her you will learn about the many guises of Mary Sues. But the first thing to remember my class," she paused looking around again " Is that not every Mary Sue is a lost cause. Secondly, while we exist to eradicate all of these foul creatures from Arda we also need to remove any other misplaced persons from Middle Earth. This job is essential to the very survival of Arda!"

Her voice had risen to a shout and many of the new students lent back in fear. Sandra laughed, then clapped her hands. " Well class copy down this notes and we will tour the premises." Tam stared at Sandra in admiration. She seemed so at ease, yet at the same time extremely proud of herself and very stern. As she lent back and rested her feet on the desk again, Tam surmised that this was not the case. The whir came back on the black typing filled the screen. Instantly there was the frantic scrabble of pens on paper as the students took down the following notes:

_**Mary-sues and other misplaced persons.**_

_There are many types of MS and MP you will come across in your life at AMSA. _

_The first is a **Type A Mary sue**. These are the worst types of Mary sues you will encounter. They are completely lost causes and must be removed from Arda at all costs._

_**Type B Mary sue.**_

_These Mary sues are less dangerous and, with much rehabilitation and re-schooling they may be safe to release back into society, with a lot of hard work they may even become members of the AMSA. Yes that's right a few of our members were once Mary sues._

At this information all the new recruits looked around at each other with interest.

_**Type C misplaced person.**_

_These are people who know nothing or little of Arda and have not idea what is happening. They can be safely released back into society with very little_ _rehab._

_**Type D misplaced Peron.**_

_These misplaced people are hardcore Tolkien fans and are no real liability to Arda; however, for their own good they must be removed. Many of these fans become members of the AMSA._

With that the lights came back on and Sandra stood up. "Well then, I think that's everything of importance, shall we be off?"


	2. Beware the mental Sue

**WOW! People reviewed thanks guys! **

**Just a note a type A Mary sues are REALLY annoyingly perfect and will no everything about everything, while type B Mary sues are more like a very annoying teenage fan girl. Like the went-to-see-lotr-only-for-Orlando type fan girl.**

"Well then, I think that's everything of importance, shall we be off?"

Without a sound the new recruits followed her down a long hall. Brushing past them were several others all wearing the same green polo shirt emblazoned with the words The AMSA, along with their unit. Sandra paused and then sharply turned leading them into a huge room. There where 50 or so people sitting in front of computers; scanning lists of numbers and emails, as well as feedback from at least 20 different sources.

" This," said Sandra gesturing to the room. "Is intelligence. They track Mary-sues."

She moved over to one of the intelligence workers, leaving them to stare in wonder at the hugeness of the building. Taking up one side of the wall was a massive radar system showing different parts of Arda; many pink bleeping dots were flashing on it. Sandra stepped back to them, followed by the man she had been talking to. He looked young and his hair fell over his eyes. Tam looked at him in interest, he looked slightly uncomfortable at being the focus of so many people. He was dressed in the AMSA polo shirt and very old looking jeans.

"This is Elliot." Sandra said following Tam's gaze. "Right," she addressed the rest of the crowd. "On we move!"

They hurried through several more hallways, which could be compared to freeways in gridlock, past a set of doors, past a wall of flashing lights, until they entered a white corridor. The walls were plastered with Alan Lee pictures and photo stills of all manner of cities, orcs and Middle Earthen people. However, Tam noticed with interest, there were not pictures of any of the fellowship or another male from the Lord form the Rings universe. Sandra stared walking more briskly and Tam, being rather short, was soon trotting along to keep up. Tam had been looking at her feet and almost crashed into the person in front of her when Sandra stopped before a set of double glass doors. On them hug two, framed pictures: one of Professor Tolkien and one of Peter Jackson. Below them the writing stated REHABILITATION. Sandra swiped the Id hanging from a chain around her neck and the door opened. As soon as they stepped inside a wave of noise washed over them. From every speaker literature was being read. Classical music was being pounded through speakers every few meters along the corridor.

Along one wall were small offices were lined up and along the other there were doors every few meters, taped to them was what appeared to be a fact sheet and a serial number. "This," Sandra whispered even though the ward was far from silent. " Is where the Mary sues are being transformed."

From one of the door came a blood curdling shriek and a cry of "_LEGGIE!"_ Everyone visibly shuddered. The door slammed and a man appeared cursing loudly, he saw the group of people ogling at him and with his little remaining dignity straightened his glasses and walked over. " Sandra please let me kill her. She's a lost cause." He cried, ignoring the group of startled individuals behind her. Sandra rolled her eyes and turned back to the class. "This is Jasper ignore him."

With that she proceeded down the corridor, ignoring the sobbing issuing from one room.

They halted again at the end of the hallway, Jasper's threatening yells fading behind them. Two rather daunting glass doors loomed in front of them. Their menacing and sterile appearance was somewhat diminished by the fact that various AMSA members had stuck bumper stickers all over them. "This is where the hopeless Mary sues are kept." Sandra whispered, Tam thought she herd a touch of fear in her voice. "They are hard core." Sandra continued, "They are more dangerous then anything you have met. Do not listen to them for they can turn even the most Tolkien obsessed fan into a Mary sue." Sandra shuddered and led them through the door.

Tam's first impression was of a high care hospital or mental ward. In stark contrast to the Sue rehab clinic this ward was covered in an eerie silence, also, she noticed, all the staff here were female. Tam broke away from this line of though to more closely study her surroundings. The wall were bare and all the room seemed to have been sound proofed. A harried looking woman rushed up to Sandra again ignoring the flock of people trailing her.

"Sandra, bad news the MSM has just developed a new form of Sue ." she glanced distractedly at the newcomers " We need to get people down there NOW!".

Sandra turned back to the new recruits all of whom were whispering. " This concludes you introduction to The AMSA. You have all been assigned to your rooms, you will need to use you Id to get in." She flipped open her communicator and spoke hurriedly into it. Tam could only catch a bit of what she was saying. " Scott………..Recruits….now Scott!……..Not that hard……MSA……….Ward one….be careful………over and out."

" With that she turned and briskly continued down the hall, her shoes echoing in the silence until they were left standing alone. Tam looked around cautiously, Slowly a murmur broke out and developed into loud conversation**. (A/N; reminds you of assembly don't it?)**

In the corner of her eye she saw a door on her left open. A 15-year-old girl dressed in loose white pants and what appeared to be a strait jacket, with the number 0012846 stamped on the back, appeared from the door. Her hair fell down to her waist. It seemed shimmer as if a light of a thousand stars was captured within it, her features were nothing short of breathtaking, yes she was without a doubt the most beautiful girl that Tam had ever seen. Before tam could fully register the full impact of what had just happen, the door behind them opened, and a man entered nervously, tam couldn't read his nametag but she guessed he must be Scott. Tam had a split second view of his tall form before the Mary sue stiffened as if she had spotted her prey. With a ear-splitting, yet somehow harmonic, scream of rage she flung herself on Scott, her arms some how free of the straight jacket she wound up sitting oh his chest holding what appeared to be a sharpened plastic knife over his throat.

Last note: I don't really have many idea for Mary sues so if you have a vision of a Sue send it in so you can watch them be brutally brought back to reality MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

**Hit the purple button. It ate your goldfish, don't you think you should hit it?**


End file.
